What It Really Means to Know Your Worth

Issues arise throughout the days of our lives. We actually go from one issue to another attending to some, ignoring others, or letting other people handle them. An issuation is born when an issue is allowed to turn into a situation. One particular issuation seems to plague many women and that is the issue of not knowing their worth.

I suffered from this greatly. I have done the work needed to maintain peace and joy in my life; I have come to understand  as a woman I am the greatest of all creatures. The Universe has trusted me with the ability to co-create. I can then nourish the creation and any other with my own body. I have the ability to share my life at the deepest level possible for mankind. I am woman.

Yet, for years I hated the very sight of me. I made decisions based on the belief that I was less than. Oh, but now that I know who I am and whose I am! I came very close to letting my lack of self-worth turn into an issuation. It did make it to situation status, but I was able to recognize the situation and back tracked to the issue, which turned out to be I had no idea of my worth.

When you know your worth, you do not deny the feeling in the pit of your stomach when you are about to do something that is not in your best interest. You no longer allow others to disrespect you, ignore you, or put you on their back burner. Knowing your worth will no longer allow you to be the whipping post for those with misdirected anger. You no longer desire to be around people who are harming themselves.

You stop trying to save others. Yes, we all have a light, but it is up to the individual where to let it shine. I chose marriage and motherhood. My light shown brightly throughout those years and I was able to help raise three beautiful, productive human beings. Our time is now. It is all we truly have. We must embrace ourselves and accept the challenges life brings us with grace and faith. We are worthy. We are women!

Jesus Take the Wheel

"Jesus take the wheel."

You often hear people retort this phrase. I have found they are the main ones who wouldn't let him if he tried. It is almost impossible for some people to get that they can only control themselves. IF only they would take control of their minds and actions, they would not need to try to do so in regard to other folk. Faith and fear cannot co-exist. Faith means you go forward whether you know what is on the other side or not. Fear requires directions, answers, breaks, and outright defiance in some cases.

Fear is one of the leading reasons people go against God. Fear tells them that they have to know, do and be all themselves, alone. They can only feel God when they feel good. And they only feel good when they are in control. If you want to let Jesus take the wheel, you have to know and trust that your life force is not by coincidence. You have life? You are meant to live. You are meant to live YOUR life. Not the lives of others. Creating issues. Causing situations that would otherwise not be if not for your interference.

In some cases this is true for our own lives to, that we have let go and truly let God work it out. When we lean on what we understand, which is so little in reality, we tend to make choices based on our little worlds that we live in. Never once taking into account how we fit in the bigger picture. In that instance your value shoots up greatly because if you are able to impact the greater good, you have accomplished a great deal,

You cannot do that if you are everywhere. At some point, you have got to really become still and let the power of the Word wash over you in a way that touches your very soul. When you let go of the wheel, just like on a rollercoaster; you can enjoy the ride. Bumpy and frightening as life can get, knowing that you are born to win. Knowing that if you would only be still and let "Jesus take the wheel," you just may get to where you are going in one piece. What's your issue?

My Issue: #2

Another issue I have noticed is I do not look at men. I never did when I was married and it is soooo hard to break the habit. I can see a man who seems interested, but my first instinct is to turn away. I must work on this if I am to catch the eye of whose looking at me.

Whose Talking About This?

What do the horny do for Christmas?
Man, I'm in trouble. I have come close to letting an issue turn into a situation. I plan to get it together before it becomes an issuation.

One of the major reasons I married at all was due to my libido. I have a high personal integrity and when I saw how my attitude towards sex would eventually get me in trouble; I began looking for someone to marry. My husband loved being my sexual play thing. I had that for 27 years. These last two years have been hell.

Now, the issue is I'm feeling like I did when I first recognized my sexual organs at 15. That throbbing and yearning, etc. This sinner is going to fold under this pressure. My mind has been telling "NO!" over the last two years. Now my body is screaming, "YES!"

It is done!

What Are Friends For

I was recently talking to my long time friend Carmen and I told her one of the reasons I keep her as a friend is she has seen the full progression throughout the years as a woman. We became friends in my mid-twenties and our relationships has withstood some mighty foes.

One of her biggest assets is she knows most of my story with my husband because I cried on her shoulder and she would actually "just" listen the majority of the time. She allows me to get stuff out whether she has an opinion or not. One day I was telling her about a conversation I had with my husband. She interrupted me and asked, "How does he deal with it being all about you? All you say I "I, this and I that."

I listened to what she said and the first time I talked to him about my goals, dreams, etc.; I recognized that I did not talk in terms of eye. I made it about us. That really made me feel good about me. Even though when I talked to her, I said 'I' I was aware that what I wanted was for us all to gain and he knew that too.

Then there was the time I called and told her I had put him out, again. She stopped me and said, "The next time you do it, I'm gonna take custody of the TV. The poor TV been moved so much."

I laughed until I cried. She was right. It was the only thing he owned. One of the very few items he actually bought during our time together. Now, I am babysitting it.

I honor Carmen and thank her for listening to all my issuations back then. We also talked about the fact I have evolved from the sobbing, blind, dutiful wife, to a woman so sure she is sure, she is sure. She agreed. She agreed she has been witness to a woman coming deeply into her own and owning every bit of herself.

Another story about us:
I used to say, after she would complain about people's behavior, "Girl, folk got issues." I would leave it at that. One day I responded that way and she got pissed and said, "You don't never have nothing to say but folk got issues. Everybody don't have issues."

Years later she took a job at a mental health facility. She called me one night. "Girl, I see what you mean. Folks do be having issues."

We all have issues on some level. It is whether we let the issue turn into an issuation, that is the problem. We have to monitor the situations in our lives. Surround yourself with good, faithful and solid people. Be honest with each other and you will develop the same wonderful long lasting bound that Carmen and I have today.

Peace, love and soul